My body is the Leaning Town of Pisa, The sinking city of Venice, The remains of Notre Dame after the fire. It aches, creaks and is off balance. My body no longer feels like home base but a turbulent flight I must endure. Eyes closed I breathe deep, seeing where the jolt of unease and pain is located.

When, Oh when will my day come. Have I entered another “time out” in my life when people are held at bay and I’m solitary. Is that a state that must be contended with and understood as viable and positive?

Your ashes are still on the alter in the bedroom. The garden continues to bloom, grow and needs to be tended. The world moves on in a jumble of collected unrest.

Do I busy myself to quiet the ache and stifle the unrest in me? Nothing will bring you physically back. The train continues on – carrying me uncomfortable into the horizon.

Wake up. Find the joy. Smile. All’s well. Love exists in the cellular.