Author: b2c-fgf

  • Heathcliff

    After a fitful night of almost sleep, my first night of no Klonopin – I work sweaty, and as I sit here – woozy…woozy enough to not be able to do my expenses and look at the computer screen. Scenes from your/our sickbed keep rushing back to me this am as the bed keeps creeping…

  • A Manhattan

    I’m not sure why we never got the cherry’s used for our favorite Manhattan served at our favorite restaurant…Today I found them, candied cherry’s made by a company founded in 1821. I don’t have the makings for a manhattan… but all of a sudden I’m seeing that it’s the ingredients and not the Alcohol that…

  • Cancer on wheels…

    My doctor described my polyp as an express bus about to go local…a long progression to the next express stop – cancer. They caught it in time – funny to think of my gastro as a bus driver taking tokens and opening the back doors with a hydraulic “ppppssssssss” to let me off… who was…

  • Awake & Cold

    Autumn’s color’s vanished in two days. The colors that calmed me have given way to gashes of tree limbs against a stark blue sky. It amazed me how it all flips like a light switch… I’ve seen 61 of them… I read this – before washing my face and dressing. ”Truth is a circle….Truth fears…

  • Pressure Blood

    So here I sit. The chitter chatter of family holiday talk – echos around my house… lonely and alone – missing you – missing us. Melancholy has overcome me… tears are welling soon to drip down my cheeks. Why oh why did I answer the phone when I saw it was Mary Ellen. Happy in…

  • Coffee Cake & a Walk

    We never were big on holidays, you and I.After our 5th year together we started to keep it simple. A nice meal, candles lit, late afternoon, A walk before food prep and then a movie at night…. You made everything special, the table setting, food placement, drinks made, even appetizers. All thought and planned out…

  • Funny thing…

    So I thought cutting back on my drinking would help me feel more in control, more serene and here I am crying and missing you just as if I had two bourbons and a bottle of wine…like I have for the past year an a half. If I’m going to travel this journey, I’m going…

  • Saturday Night is Alright…

    Saturday Night is Alright…

    I’m dressed in your clothes, wearing your jewelry, our wedding rings but still time is standing still… How many movies can I watch – how many glasses of wine as I sit alone… eating my meal alone… taking the time to feed myself with a real meal…all I have is two cats and a dog..…

  • Socks

    You always told me never to wear socks as I walked down our steps…I fell honey, I had just closed the door to the basement to go downstairs an I missed a step and crumbled to the floor. Yelling help, scared… and overwhelmed by the fact that no one could help me… Just like when…

  • boxed

    I gave away your jean jacket, your favorite sweater sportcoat, cashmere sweater… Your bomber jacket from the 80’s – to Garris. Boxed up…sent… Your Top hat, boa and linen vest to lola…along with a painted rock. boxed and sent – to someone who never met you and only relation is her sexuality and me –…