Author: b2c-fgf
-
Skin
I’m fascinated by the way my upper lip feels. It’s been over 20 years since I’ve had a clean face, no hair to adorn it and the top of my head no longer has the weeds growing on top. My lips are a gash across the large planes of my head. Uncomfortably feminine. My mother’s…
-
anxiety, a disorder…
I had an anxiety attack yesterday mid day. It was so easily slipped into even though I hadn’t experienced one in 6 months, not to this degree. Images of your death, PTSD are flowing into my days and I have to stamp on them like one of those beautiful red flying insects invading the US…
-
Gnats
Distractions trigger a response. I hear them loud and clear in my mind trying to work out their senseless obvious conclusions… impassioned negative energy thrown about can glide quickly into my being. A simple BOE candidate debate turns into a brawl of egos….it’s infected – no – stirred my inner psyche so all I hear…
-
Shark
Sitting in the dunes as high tide erased the shoreline, I understood I could pay for this. It was just cool enough that the warm midday sand warmed my legs and the sun felt temperate. Fisherman and their fishing families, fishing children, fishing clusters of generations – all casting, looking to the horizon for a…
-
Early
Balance is way off this morning, head leaden, stomach nauseous, entire surface of my skin is tingling, energy is at 3. I am aware. Aware of my state of my body as it tries to maintain balance, focus on the complex calculations that you cells are making to steady the ship – they are there…
-
The wind
you’re there as the wind flutters my shirt the flame on your alter is your deep breath white sheets are our relationship cloth – comforting, soothing, wrapping 2 individuals into one tableau the coffee waits for you on your night stand my hands blind search for your tattoos there you are just beyond my reach…
-
The end of the road
Yesterday after my doctors appointment I realized my health situation is just like your death. There is no remedy. No drugs to make it better. This is the situation. Stop beating your head against the wall – anger emitting from your cells that no one is listening. They are listening. They have no answers. Just…
-
Headline
”Life is a dream. Keep it simple.” Those two sentences woke me this Sunday morning. Sweep the doubts, fears to the trash bin only after you recognize what’s standing behind them in plain sight. It’s not a laborious act. At this time of life it’s a breath in and out – recognizing the phantom and…
-
Owler
With wide glassy mirror eyes, I greet the horizon. A wet, cloudy horizon hanging over a turbulent sea. Safely in bed, cat at my side, dog sleeping on my leg…darkness surrounds the bedroom. The candle is lit upon your alter. It’s calling you home, back to this world. We’re both being called back to this…
-
Waking up
After two days of zombie like state, waking up, there was a level of awareness I haven’t felt in days. Walking the dog I could see farther than my feet, feel the air and walk without the heavy chainmail of illness. I cherish this moment as I know it could slip away in a matter…