Category: Thoughts
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Laughing at death
The dinner party last night was relaxed and entertaining. Surrounded by estrogen we each had our turn to entertain each other and make jokes the others would catch in their memory net. With covid cases rising around the US, it was stated that we were using our fingers to add the condiments from communal bowls.…
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Fuzz
I’m so aware of my body when I wake. It crowds out thoughts. The heavy head with a fuzzy buzz, nauseous stomach and tingling legs, face, mouth, feet, nipples, balls, How to fix my nervous system? 7 months now. Yesterday – I listed your paintings in the left cupboard. Paints were wiped down and put…
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Whose Story?
I woke to find a world where individuals are letting the loudest voice tell their story, and fulfill their own needs through “drones”. Repeating a thread, a hound dog intent on the single sent, masses are making judgements for their lives based on 1 aspect of the story. Who in their right mind bases any…
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Nesting
Without thinking – I painted the new shutters for the second floor cream. And in distrust I looked at the two coats and thought – I’m uncomfortable. Too much too bright, too cute. I had created the idea for A’s restaurant in tones of grey and she had painted them bright cream. After taking the…
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lightness
I see lightness in your being in the near future. The full moon says so…the emotional heaviness no longer serves you or the world. That beautiful you becomes the brighter flame. Last night was a full moon burn. Parts of your paintings old mallas, notes and the “Mary” pillow. Light blue linen 9 inch square…
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Rating the Day
The day starts with surveying my body – how it feels, balance, heaviness of my scalp, etc. Then onto my insides – where am I as I wake to the world of day. Today – nausea 8, neuropathy heavy in the legs, arms and some in the face 7, vertigo 5, Brian fog 7, my…
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Chasing my tail
I woke to more nausea than usual. Coffee that usually makes me feel comforted in bed as I do the NYT leaves me uneasy and bloated. The cat cleaning itself makes me feel seasick. Everything around me is hard to take in with my sight. Good Wednesday morning. Angry and full of angst. Yesterday was…
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Hope & Dread
I wake up and everything is still is in that – sleepy unaware state. I felt queasy but was aware the tingling was dull. Then 5 minutes after walking downstairs – nausea takes over, tingling gage goes way up and my head gets heavier. And yet. The candle it lit on your altar. The pets…
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Monday Monday…
I wake up with tingling legs, lips and arms – with you my love like a warm quilt wrapped around my view. Your face is everywhere but the nausea in my stomach keeps me from reaching/touching my feelings of loss, pleasure of the sight of your face. Your sensual body covered in star tats and…